my heart aches

do you have a memory from your childhood or your past that brings good tears to your heart? tears of aching happiness that swell your heart with passionate memories? my heart aches at the sound of a piano.
I began playing the piano when I was five years old. my mom played too, she thought that it would be good for me to learn to play an instrument. I played my heart out for thirteen years. I played solos, duets, concertos, hymns, and even wrote some of my own songs too. I studied mostly classical piano. I fell in love with Debussy, twisted my fingers learning Brahms, and wanted to learn every Chopin waltz written.
every year, I competed in a local and state level for piano. each year I played in the solo competition, but I also competed in hymn playing and concertos. when I turned 18, I received the most prestigious reward for my hard effort, and by far, my biggest accomplishment yet. achieving a superior rating was difficult. receiving a superior rating consecutive years in a row was even harder. I received my most rewarding trophy for twelve years consecutive superior ratings in piano solo on the night of my senior recital, my last piano recital before graduating highschool. {this was also the night that I played Bach, Beethoven, and Brahms while crying my eyes out}

this week, Ali has been tributing Amelie, which I must admit, I’ve never seen. I’ve found it to be quite intriguing following her posts, but today, I was breathless. this song, has so much passion. so much feeling. I can not wait to place my fingers on keys of the piano and teach myself to play this song. again my heart aches.

now, I said that my heart aches at the sound of the piano. and it does. not because hearing the piano makes me sad but because not having a piano leaves me heartsick. not being able to play and remembering less and less each day fills me with sorrow. but it’s not a total sob story. I’ve got plans of buying a piano sometime this year or next. a keyboard. to save space and give me that therapeutic ability to sit down and play.

if you are new to classical music, or would like some suggestions of some gorgeous works, here are some of my favorites:
Chopin Nocturne in E flat major
Debussy Suite Bergamasque Prelude
Brahms Intermezzo Op. 118 No. 2 – especially the part after 2:30.
Grieg Concerto part 1
Schubert Impromptu Op. 90 No. 4 – one of my absolute favorite songs. ever.

{sorry for the long, wordy post. it gave me a chance to listen and share some of my absolute favorite music.}

13 Responses to “my heart aches”

  1. Chelsea said:

    Debussy and Chopin are probably my favorites. I LOVE nocturnes. I played the piano too but just off and on. I was never very good at practicing and therefore was never very good. But, I still love to play just for fun. I think it really is theraputic.

    You should find a piano soon!

  2. a cat of impossible colour said:

    Thanks, Alyson! I used to have the sheet music from Amelie but lost it in one of our moves, so I will have to hunt it out again. I love that piece too.

    Have you seen The Piano? The theme from that is just so beautiful as well. It’s definitely worth learning!

  3. Wendy said:

    I too played piano when I was younger, and Chopin’s Nocturne in E flat major was also one of my favorites. I love Chopin. Now I’m curious about the other songs you’ve listed :) I miss playing too.. I appreciate it now much more than I did back then..

  4. lucyre said:

    amelie is one of my absolute favorites, and the music is just one of many elements that make so superb. i have always loved the sounds of a well-played piano and (like so many it seems) hope to someday learn to play a bit myself. :) you’re blessed to have such talent and experience.

  5. jenny said:

    wonderful post. i’m so impressed by your piano abilities. i wish i could play, but i’m just not musical. i took lessons for years, but i was horrible. to be able to play and sing, that would be truly wonderful….some of my favorites are chopin and debussy. have you ever listened to eric satie? such pretty music. and the music in amelie gets me every time.

  6. Sara Christine said:

    Fantastic post. I think I know just the kind of heartache you mean. I feel that way about ballet. Dancing was something I loved as a child but haven’t done for many years. Now everytime I see a ballerina my heart hurts a little bit. Nostalgia maybe? Funny how that happens.

  7. Taylor said:

    this is a touching post. thanks for sharing! Taylor

  8. laceyJ. said:

    I had the exact same reaction to Ali’s post this morning… So inspiring. I know the ache you’re referring to- it’s the same ache that can usually be filled when you play!

    Hopefully you can get your fingers on some keys… soon!

  9. amy korngiebel said:

    lovely post. inspiring. congrats on your accomplishments.
    learning the piano has been on my “life to do” list forever. i’ve been thinking about it a lot lately. i think you’ve just pushed me over the edge toward getting my own keyboard.

  10. Catherine said:

    To be able to play an instrument would be one of the most enviable talents for me, I wish so much I could listen to music like that and then be able to learn it for myself. I hope you get the chance to learn it, I have only seen Amelie once, but rd has the soundtrack and every now and then when the ipod is on shuffle one of the songs comes on and just completely takes you to another place and stops you in your tracks. So beautiful.

  11. Borda said:

    Is it sad that this post made me cry? No seriously, I have tears in my eyes. I remember that trophy. I remember all your hard work. And most importantly, I remember Larke, your piano teacher for all of those years. I can absolutely guarantee that you really were amazing on the piano because I remember going to your recitals. I hope that you do play again because you really were amazing. And I remember when you considered majoring in college in piano instead of graphic design.

    Ok, this is turning into an 8th grade yearbook signing…

  12. ali said:

    I like your long, wordy posts, and I’m happy that a little something on my blog inspired such a movement in you. You need to buy the Amelie sheet music and play to your heart’s delight, and then record it and put it on youtube so we can watch/hear YOU.

    My heart aches when I watch dance: ballets, Alvin Ailey, So You Think You Can Dance. Your piano experience is my dance experience.

  13. ali said:

    And you need to see Amelie! Grab a beer for you and DLB and hit the couch for a viewing. I think you will love it.